yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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