I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
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