:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize