She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
