Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Well I just put wine in my tea
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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