She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
