i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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