Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
