Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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