There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
