i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize