new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Then you guys just all showered together...?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
