I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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