i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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