Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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