I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize