gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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