I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
