end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
