Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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