Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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