I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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