he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Randomize
