how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
