i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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