i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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