We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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