Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
i permit you to call me
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
