What tipped you off? The sombrero?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
