hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
