why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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