State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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