Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
