Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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