Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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