Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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