that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
