And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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