i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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