I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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