this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
