sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
