home. puking in laundry basket.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
