i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
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