It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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