i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
i think i have herpe
just one?
Is it because I queefed?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
