Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize