around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize