i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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