maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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