Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
