Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
